i look at your body
in the photos,
all straight angles and muscles
and i can’t imagine
anyone inside of you.
not because of religion
or discipline, but
the physics of it:
you were cleaner than sex.
cleaner than me
and the rest of us,
the quick pleasure of it.
your names meant
strong and pure,
not a purity of body
as much as
a purity of mind;
a conviction
i never had.